Awake my soul.

Lend me your hand & we'll conquer them all. 

(but your soul you must keep totally free)

I always come back to the place that's comfortable.  I've spent the last month, on a road trip going no where. That's the best way to describe what they pay me to do. I'm able to pull over and pee. I can't grab snacks, I got those during the two hours I actually drove. I spend eight hours of my life, sitting in a vehicle waiting. I'm really good at waiting, in fact... I can do it for hours at a time with little to no contact with any other life form except raising my head to wave at those whom pass by me with purpose.  Where is my purpose? 

I struggle to find any truth in your lies.

(and now my heart stumbles on things i dont know)

Where did my list go? You know the list, the list of goals and dreams that should be taped and measured to every door before you head out into the world. I did, however, apply for my GI Bill. Sometimes, I wish I hadn't and I just dove into classes. Didn't look back... but this is such a great way to go that how could I not see if I'm eligible for such an honor of education.

my weakness i feel, i must finally show.

I would really love to be educated. I would really love to someday walk across a stage for my family. Someday, someday it'll be a reality. I need to remember that and start living towards that knowledge of truth. I will get there... as long as I keep running in that direction nothing can hold me back.  I guess this is why, during my hours of waiting... I'm trying to read as much as possible. My weakness in this constant novel companionship is the lack of depth. That needs to increase, or something I can walk away with. 

in these bodies we will live. 

in these bodies we will die.

I feel like I'm still struggling with the loss of 2010 and what was left behind that year. I try not to talk about it or the other tragedy that has happened in my life. We all have them, they're all terribly hard but we continue to live because .... life continues.  I had a really hard go of 2010 and sometimes I feel like there some amazing and incredibly beautiful people brought into my life to help keep me from stumbling. To help keep my wings from folding. I'm so grateful if I continue a positive outlook of those whom I still have in my life, &not those that will forever be just beyond the clouds. 

&where you invest your love.

you invest your life.

I don't know why, at 0622 on the fifth day of the second month of the year two thousand and eleven, I felt the need to write but it's been awhile. So I write, I did. . . I will now remove myself from the computer and do something today. Something fun with my sweet child, whom gives me reasons beyond myself for everything I do.